Dating Post-Divorce

If you’ve been through a rough divorce and are looking to “get back out there,” so to speak, you may be wondering how long you should wait before you start dating again.  While there is no right answer, if you have children, it’s important that you take it slow and easy.

Many children of divorce hold out hope that their parents will reconcile, and they often have adverse reactions to seeing their parent date another person.  When a parent does begin dating, the child may struggle with the realization that the dreamed-of parental reconciliation is not going to happen.

Most experts agree that when you do start dating, don’t introduce your companion to your child for a while.  Give your new relationship some time to see if it blossoms into a longer-term relationship. Meet your new companion away from home, or schedule dates on days when your child is with your ex-spouse.  It’s important to be careful about who you introduce your child to in this role. The last thing you want to do is parade a string of new companions in front of your child.  That is not the stability your child needs right now and, because a child can easily become attached to a new parental figure, the child may feel a sense of loss if a breakup occurs.

Additionally, it is difficult for a child of any age to share a parent with a new companion right after a divorce.  A child may feel left out when the parent spends time with a new companion, or the child may feel uncomfortable with another adult stepping into a parental role.

If approached responsibly and properly, however, dating after divorce can have positive consequences for you and your child.  Parents who are in solid relationships tend to be happier, and a caring companion can be a good role model for a child.

If you would like more information or if your ex-spouse is threatening changes in custody because of a new companion in your life, an experienced Franklin child custody attorney can help you through the process of handling post-divorce life with children.