Should I Get a Divorce? How to Know When It’s Time
There are several signs to weigh and consider before deciding on divorce. In this blog, we’ve outlined common signs, questions to ask, and other considerations. Keep reading to learn more.
If you are ready to speak to an attorney, the team at Adrian H. Altshuler & Associates offers free consultations. Contact us today to discover more about your legal options.
Signs it may be time for a divorce
Each marriage and couple is unique. Signs that it may be time for a divorce can appear in many ways. In general, the following signs may be a red flag:
Poor communication
Does it seem like every conversation turns into an argument? Does it feel like you’re walking on eggshells to avoid an eruption? Is criticism a daily part of life now? Do you feel misunderstood, frustrated, or done with it all?
Poor communication is one of the major reasons marriages fail. Many people struggle with proper, open communication. This leads to arguments, misunderstandings, and frustration for all involved. When poor communication runs the show, with no signs of resolving, many people may wonder if it’s time for a divorce.
Betrayal
Has your trust been betrayed? Whether through infidelity or other forms of betrayal, many people do not want to move past the situation. When a betrayal breaks the foundational trust of a relationship, divorce is a logical decision for many people.
Disconnected
Have you become more like friends or roommates instead of a couple? Many married couples fall into routines, or ruts, that go on for so long that there seems to be no way out. Feeling disconnected may not be a total red flag or sign of divorce for some people. However, when this comes along with other signs, it leads many to choose divorce.
Unmet needs
Unmet needs in a relationship can destroy feelings. Many people find themselves thinking of a divorce long before they make the decision to act on it. When unmet needs go on for so long without resolution, it may result in a divorce.
Emotional, sexual, or physical abuse
Abuse of any kind is a red flag. Abuse can show up emotionally, physically, or sexually. Many people hope their partners will change, and they live with abuse longer than they should have. Anyone in an abusive relationship should seek legal advice.
If you are the victim of abuse and need immediate help, there are resources available.
Questions to ask before divorce
Most people try everything before deciding to divorce. Here are some common questions to ask yourself and honestly answer if you are contemplating a divorce:
- Am I happy?
- Is my partner happy?
- When is it time to let go of my relationship?
- Are the problems fixable?
- Are the problems situational or short-term?
- Are children involved and being affected?
- Have I tried everything in my power?
- Do I want a divorce?
- Are my expectations reasonable?
- Is “insert issue” a dealbreaker?
Speaking to a knowledgeable divorce lawyer may help people better understand their legal options and next steps.
The emotional and practical considerations
One effect of divorce is emotional turmoil. Many people, though greatly unhappy, experience regret after initiating a divorce. They go through a whirlwind of emotions, much like the grief cycle. When filing for divorce, a lot of people are desperately trying to end unhappiness or a negative situation. They don’t consider the emotional fallout that will follow.
Other practical considerations that may need to be evaluated include living arrangements, child custody, and finances. Each situation is unique to the couple. It’s advisable to speak to a divorce attorney to learn more about your options.
Pros and cons of divorce
There are pros and cons of divorce. They include:
Pros of divorce
Some of the pros of divorce:
- It can end the conflict or abuse, resulting in improved mental health and well-being.
- Many people experience higher happiness levels and lower stress.
- People have more personal control over their finances.
- Divorce creates an opportunity to start fresh.
- It may lead to fewer conflicts or negative situations for children if they are involved.
- Many people feel free after a divorce.
The pros of divorce will vary based on the person and their situation. This list is not exhaustive and is not intended to demonstrate guaranteed pros.
Cons of divorce
A few of the cons of divorce include:
- Divorce may be expensive and a lengthy process.
- Many couples face less financial security once separated.
- There may be emotional trauma that needs therapy and years to heal.
- It may harm the children if they are involved.
- Many people experience a loss of other relationships and their overall support system.
- There may be a social stigma attached to divorce that is difficult for many people to overcome.
The cons of divorce often leave people second-guessing if it’s the correct decision. Some couples may benefit more from pursuing a legal separation rather than an immediate divorce. It’s important to speak to a divorce attorney to understand the legal options for your specific situation.
Contact Adrian H. Altshuler & Associates for a confidential consultation
Many people struggle with the decision to end a marriage. Divorce is a major life change that can affect your family, finances, and future. You don’t have to try to make the decision alone. Consulting with a knowledgeable divorce attorney can help you gain clarity to make an informed decision.
At Adrian H. Altshuler & Associates, we offer confidential consultations. This allows us to hear your unique situation and offer compassionate, insightful legal advice. Contact us today to request your consultation.